


Too Chatty

by Darknecessary



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Monster Hunter (Video Games), Soul Eater
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Crossdressing, Dialogue-Only, Hurt/Comfort, Love Triangles, M/M, Multi, Nygmobblepot, One Shot Collection, Schizoid Personality Disorder, Scriddler, riddlecrow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2018-09-22 17:47:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 5,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9618485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darknecessary/pseuds/Darknecessary
Summary: After Oswald and Edward broke, Ed falls in love with Jonathan- somehow?The Riddler and Scarecrow are reluctant, but somewhat of a love triangle found its way.Only dialogue, first Chapter for Overwiew.AFTER Nygmobblepot (NOT compulsory 'Gotham' - story, just Nygmobblepot)





	1. Overview

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to take the dialoguechapters from my lil torture-gallery. It just felt good to write and I want to go on with it.

**Jonathan Crane**

**ScArEcRoW**

_Edward Nygma_

The Riddler

Oswald Cobblepot/The Penguin

VICTOR ZSASZ

  
  
Chapter   1 - Overwiew

Chapter   2 - Secrets

Chapter   3 - Team up

Chapter   4 - Clear up-Service

Chapter   5 - Breaking up

Chapter   6 - You should wear this

Chapter   7 - New Roommates

Chapter   8 - Fear and what did you say?

Chapter   9 - Just drunken stuff

Chapter 10 - HROO HRAA

Chapter 11 - Some Difficulty  
  
Chapter 12 - Not that kind of Doctor

Chapter 13 - Cardgames

Chapter 14 - So mean

Chapter 15 - Not listening


	2. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eddie has some important questions. 
> 
> at 4 am.
> 
> But it's important!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluff, Love, Comfort, Hurt, Choking, Angst

_Jon?.... Are you sleeping?_  
  
**Hm...No. Whats up, Ed? It's 4 in the morning.**  
  
_I just.... when are you going to tell them?_  
  
**Who?**  
  
_All of them. The others. They are talking behind our backs. I think they-_  
  
**I will not.**  
  
_Wh_ y? _Are you embarrassed?_  
  
**No.**  
  
_But why won't you? I mean... I don't want to hide it anymore._  
  
**It's not theirs. They don't need to set about.**  
  
_But they do!_  
  
**Quiet.**  
  
_Jon!_  
  
**Edward.**  
  
_Jonathan! No. I am mad with you! Stop touching me._  
  
**Edward.**  
  
_No! Jon, you don't even admit your love in front of others!_  
  
**Others? Joker. Harley. Bane. Surely the people I want to share my feelings with.**  
  
_But... You don't even... tell me._  
  
**Ed.**  
  
_Oh, shut up. It's the truth. You know that._  
  
**Ed. Look at me.**  
  
_Fuck you. You did not even say it once! You are running around like the untouchable Dr. Without-Feelings!_  
  
**Come back to bed, Ed.**  
  
_You refuse to kiss, or touch me, when we are outside!_  
  
**Edward.**  
  
_Everyone knows! Everyone! Even fucking Batman keeps teasing me!_  
  
**I'm sorry.**  
  
_YOU are coward!_  
  
**ED.**  
  
_You are a gutless chicken! You don't know how hard it is, to pretend._  
  
**Quiet.**  
  
_To play just as nothing is going on! Only because YOU have the FEAR to- what? Lose your face? Great Master of no fear and--_  
  
**I sAiD sHuT uP! ShUt YoUr NoT-kNoWiNg MoUtH!**  
  
_Crow-...._  
  
**No! LiStEn WeLl, ED!**  
  
_Crow!..._  
  
**LoViNg YoU iS hIs pRiVaCy!**  
  
_Can't-..._  
  
**NoOnE NEEDS tO kNoW! yOu ArE mInE! i OwN yOu! YoU oWe Me YoUr LiFe!**  
  
_AIR!_  
  
**Oh.**  
  
_Ah... Crow... Uff. Give me Jon. I want to talk to him...., not you!_  
  
**HmPf! FiNe!**  
  
_Thank you._  
  
**So?**  
  
_So.... I love you, Jon. I love you more than anything else. I need you. And I don't want to hide it._  
  
**I see.**  
  
_Yes._  
  
**...**  
  
_..._  
  
**Well. Maybe we can... take it slow. We could start with... sitting together at Joker's Den?**  
  
_Fine._  
  
**Fine.**  
  
_It's better than nothing, isn't it?_  
  
**Seems so. May I kiss you now?**  
  
_Hm._  
  
**...... Please?**  
  
_Fine. But no sex tonight._  
  
**I love you.**  
  
_NOW YOU CAN?! NO SEX!_  
  
**Haha.... Ed... I love you.**  
  
_Stupid asshole... I love you, too. Just hold me._  
  
**Promised.**  
  



	3. Team Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scarecrow makes demands on Edward, the Riddler wants revenge on Oswald and Os-.... Is confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Torture mentioned.

**YoU kNoW, wE sHoUlD tEaM uP.**  
  
They are teamed up.   
  
**YeA, tHeY aRe. I mEaNt Us. We CoUlD bE sTrOnG.**  
  
Think so? This here will be the only time I team with you.  
  
**'CaUsE?**  
  
You are crazy?  
  
**YeS? dO yOu SeNsE sO?**  
  
You are scaring Eddie.   
  
**He Is MiNe!**  
  
You are hurting him. I hate you.  
  
**He IS MiNe!**  
  
He's Cranes.   
  
**I oWn CrAnE!**  
  
No you don't.   
  
**QuIeT!**  
  
You cannot impress me. I am not scared.   
  
**YoU wIlL bE! i CaN sCaRe YoU!**  
  
You can't. Concentrate now please.   
  
**WhY dO yOu ThInK, i CaN't?**  
  
I am needed to fight, I am needed to win. I can change fear and bring glory, with me, you can slay the dragon, or just speak.  
  
**YoU aRe NoT BRAVE, RiDdLeR! i CaN sCaRe AnYoNe!**  
  
Shush up! He's gonna wake up, if you keep screaming.   
  
**I dOn'T cArE! i HaTe YoU!**  
  
Cool. In this case, we don't need to team.   
  
**WeLl I tHiNk, He AwAkEs! ShOuLd I sEnD hIm BaCk To DrEaMlAnD?**  
  
No. It's ok. We will arrive soon.   
  
**InTeReStInG! dId NoT kNoW, yOu CoUlD bE tHaT cReAtIvE, rIdDlEmAn. DiD yOu SkIn HiM?**  
  
A bit.   
  
**ThOuGhT yOu LoVeD hIm.**  
  
Hm.   
  
**AnD?**  
  
Shut up.   
  
**No. I aM iNtErEsTeD. yOu LoVeD hIm.**  
  
No. Ed loved him. I hated him. He hurted Ed. The same reason I hate you.   
  
**WeLl YoU hAtE mE, yOu GoInG tO sKiN mE?**  
  
Maybe.   
  
**InTeReStInG.**  
  
...  
  
**...**  
  
What the...?!  
  
**Hi!**  
  
How... Why...Eddie?!  
  
Oswald please. I am driving. Let go.   
  
Ed, it is staring at me!  
  
**YoU aRe KiNd Of HaNdSoMe, LiTtLe BiRdY!**  
  
Oswald! Sit back! Scarecrow, stop that.   
  
What the fuck is going on?!  
  
**MaYbE i WiLl KeEp It!**  
  
You won't. He is still Ed's.   
  
**Ed Is StIlL mInE, qUeRy!**  
  
Wow, ugh, kiss already.  
  
Shut up! Both of you!  
  
**HmPf.**  
  
Excuse me, Riddler, I think I want to know, what you two are planning with me.   
  
You hurt Ed-  
  
WHEN?!  
  
Also Crane is very.... proprietorial.  
  
When did I hurt Edward?  
  
You do hurt him all the time. You called it quit. You ripped his heart out and-  
  
**Be CaReFuLl, BiG guY! nOt ThAt YoU cRaSh HiS bElOvEd ChEvRoLeT.**  
  
Yes.   
  
**BrEaTh.**  
  
Am breathing.   
  
**GoOd.**  
  
And now, you are planning tooooo....?  
  
I will kill you.   
  
Ha! Oh, Riddler. Think about it. You know, what potential we have. You know what we can do together. All three of us!  
  
**GoOd PoInT!**  
  
Will not team up with the man, who hurts Eddie.   
  
**CrAnE hUrTs EdDiE. i HuRt EdDiE.**  
  
Will not team up with you either.  
  
But it would be the right thing.  
  
I hate you. Both of you.   
  
Riddler... I am sorry. Yes I... I ended our relationship. I just wanted to protect Eddie. I have many enemies. I already lost a very important person and I don't want him to be killed because of me.   
  
Lies. All lies.   
  
**HeY. rIdDlEr! WhAt Is BlAcK, wInGeD, aNnOyInG aNd VeRy ClOsE?**  
  
SHIT! FUCK! FUCK!  
  
Maybe we should team up?  
  
This will be the last time, I will meet any of you fucking dickheads!  
  
**SuRe. Ed NeEdS lOvE. yOu KnOw ThAt.**  
  
Gmmmrmmmrlm...   
  
Ha. Delicious. So we are... A treesome now?  
  
**HaHaHaHa, ThAt WaS fUnNy, UmBrElLa-BoY!**  
  
It was not. Gather your stuff. We have to hunt now.   
  
**GoT iT!**  
  
CROW! How about you let me stop fir- and he jumped out....   
  
Riddler?  
  
What?   
  
I am sorry. I will do my best, to make you two happy again.  
  
Which two - HEY! STOP jumping out of my driving car! 


	4. Clear up-Service

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eddie is tidying up and is really not in the mood for the other two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Choking, after sex cuddling

Wow. What did the vacuum cleaner do to you? You are fucking aggressive!  
  
_What did you say? The vacuum cleaner was to noisy.  
  
_ I said: Good morning, Darl. I brought Crossaints.  
  
_Of course you said that.  
  
_ Whats bugging you?  
  
_Oh. Well. Seems I am the maid now. Crane could not even trash the shards of his damn test tube.  
  
_ I have people cleaning up for me- Oh. Sorry. Uhm, I love you?  
  
_Yes.  
_  
Are you mad with me? Can I get a kiss, please? _  
_  
_Hmh.  
  
_ Thank you. Where is Crane, anyways?  
  
_I don't know. Hopefully he's dead.  
_  
Eddie... Don't say things like that. You know, you do love him.  
  
_Yes.  
  
_ Sometimes.  
  
_Ya.  
  
_ Sort of.....  
  
_Oswald...  
  
_ Why do you stay with him?  
  
_Lift your feet please, or get out the way.  
  
_ Sorry. Uhm, I mean, he's abusive and... he slobbers over fear.  
  
_Yes.  
  
_ He tortures you with his feargas. I did never hurt you.  
  
_Yes. No. Ya.... You did not.  
  
_ Riddler wanted to kill me, you know?  
  
_I know.  
  
_ Ed, would you kindly look at me?  
  
_I have no time_ _to-_  
  
I love you. More than anything else.  
  
_I know.  
  
_ So why do you stay with him?  
  
_I.... I don't know.  
  
_ Why does the Riddler let him torture you? I cannot understand-  
  
**You don't have to, little umbrella-boy.  
  
** J-Jonathan... H-hey.  
  
**There he starts to stutter again. Sweet.  
  
**_Would you PLEASE fuck off my way now!?  
  
_**Sorry.  
  
** Apology....  
  
**Well, you see, I am a scientist.  
  
** H-Have noticed that.  
  
**So. I can lay the Riddler into some deep slumber, when needed. I love my playtime with Eddie, you know.  
  
** Noticed as-... as well.  
  
**Maybe I will keep you as my new-  
  
** You won't.   
  
**Who tells me?  
  
** I do. Oswald is mine.   
  
**Oh, I am sorry, great Riddler. Genius of Gotham and Master of Puzzles.  
  
** You should be.   
  
**Weren't you cleaning this mess? I mean, it won't by itself-  
  
** How about you doing it, Crane?!  
  
**Uhrg. Well. Can't if. You keep.... Pressing my neck.  
  
** Hmh. Should keep going on.   
  
R-Riddler... please. I am fine, ok? Stop arguing.  
  
We are not arguing.   
  
**Totally... Not.  
  
** This is deeper.   
  
**Very dee-Hrgs, deep. Can nearly reach your ovaries- Arg...  
  
** Shut the fuck up. I hate you.   
  
**Both of us.  
  
** Yes, both of you!  
  
Me?  
  
Wha- Hrmgrm... Ok. All three of you!  
  
So... why are you... staying again?  
  
Ed loves you.   
  
Me?  
  
No. Santa Clause! Of course you!  
  
And him?  
  
.... I.... don't really know.   
  
**Charming.  
  
** Shut up!   
  
Maybe I could call someone to clean this up?  
  
It's totally not the point, Penguin!  
  
Not?  
  
Not.   
  
**Who's there?  
  
** AHRG!  
  
**Ahrg who?  
  
** My fist in your Ass!  
  
**Oh, I aM eXcItEd!  
  
** What do you want now?!  
  
**JoIn ThE gAmE!  
  
** I g-gotta go n-now.  
  
**YoU sTaY!  
  
** Hey. Don't touch him!   
  
Eddie!  
  
**Ed Is NoT hErE!  
  
** Surprise, asshole. I am!  
  
**SuPeR eXcItEd!  
  
  
  
** ~About one hour later~  
  
  
  
**This totally needs to stop.  
  
** I heard, sex is the best way to overcome disputes.  
  
**He tried to choke me to death.  
  
** Yes. But then we had sex. And look at him. He is sleeping so peacefully.  
  
**Yes. Sort of cute.  
  
** Maybe you should start to clean your stuff asap. It's less work later.  
  
**Maybe.**    
  
I could hire a clear up service.  
  
**No bad idea.  
  
** You think so?  
  
**It would be easier for Mr. Super-Neat.**  
**  
** I really do love him. Both of him.  
  
**You are some crazy bird.  
  
** And you are not?  
  
**Stop giggling.  
  
** Sorry. Try to sleep now, ok? I will do, too.  
  
**Good night, Penguin.  
**  
We have midday but good night, Jon.  
  
**Don't call me that.  
  
** Ok. Good night, great Master of Fear,  
  
**...  
  
**...  
  
**Cobblepot.  
  
** Huh? Yes?  
  
**Why... Why do you hold him? I want to hold him!  
  
** Uhm... Ok, well uhm... be careful. Slowly.  
  
_Mhm? What are you doing?  
  
_**Sorry. Didn't want to wake you up.  
  
**_Os... I want to cuddle.  
  
_ I'm here.  
  
**Ed?  
  
**_Mhm?  
  
_**Is this... comfortable? You... are sort of sqeezed.  
  
**_Yes. Just hold me.  
  
_ Good night Ed. Night Crane.  
  
**Good night Cobblepot. Sleep well Edward.**  
  
_Night Os. Night Jon. I love you._  
  
Me? Hey. Why are you chuckling?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this... ended not as planed.... but.... I did not really had a plan so. ... I like it ^^'


	5. Breaking up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens if one of them tries to call it quit?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm in a flow *----*'' I am sorry.

~~First Try~~  
  
  
  
Eddie. Can we talk?  
  
_Mhm.  
  
_ Ehm... Would you please- What the fuck is- is that a butt on -What are you playing?!  
  
_Oh, yes, it's amazing! Its a uhm... Puzzle-Platformer-Moral-Decision-Storybased-Dating-Simulator! I love it.  
  
_ A what?!  
  
_You play as Victor and he loves Katherine with K, and then there is Catherine with C and she tries to-  
  
_ Ed. Please. Hey.  
  
_Excuse me.  
  
_ Ed....I.... I want to break up with you.  
  
_But... I love you.  
  
_ Yes, and I appreciate that, but... You are in constant danger and-  
  
You won't.  
  
What?  
  
You won't leave him.   
  
But-  
  
You will not break his heart.  
  
Riddler...  
  
No. If you make him cry, I will break your bones.   
  
But...  
  
You will not.   
  
I-  
  
You will NOT break up with Edward.   
  
Riddler....  
  
NO!  
  
Well... Ok then, I guess... I will not... I am sorry.  
  
You should be. Now go, this is a bossstage.   
  
I love him...   
  
Acknowledged.  
  
May I kiss you?  
  
Hmh.   
  
Ok.  
  
...  
  
Eddie? May I watch you play?  
  
_Of course! I thought it bores you?  
  
_ I love it to watch you, when you are joyful. Just let me watch you.  
  
_All right. I love you!  
  
  
  
_~~Second Try~~  
  
  
  
_I want to break up with you.  
  
_**Ok.  
  
**_I mean you- wait, what?  
  
_**Ok. You want to go, there is the door.  
  
**_You throwing me out?  
  
_**Sure.  
  
**_What ever. I'll go and pack then.  
  
_**Sure.  
  
**_No: 'Please stay?'_  
  
**Do you want me to beg you? Should I suspend you?  
  
**_No!_   _But why don't you-  
  
_**Because you will come back.  
  
**_Well...  
  
_**You know that I am right.  
  
**_... Yes... I know....  
  
  
_  
~~Third Try~~  
  
  
  
**GeT oUt Of HeRe!  
  
** T-this is m-my house!  
  
**I sAiD gEt Out!  
  
** Sorry... I'm history.  
  
**GoOd.  
  
**  
  
~~Fourth Try~~  
  
  
  
_I want you to go.  
  
_ Out of question.   
  
_But-  
  
_ No buts. I am here to protect you.   
  
_But- You-  
  
_ No one will hurt you.   
  
_You hurt me. You hurt my friends.  
  
_ I protect you!   
  
_You -  
  
_ I will always be there for you.  
  
_Riddler...  
  
_ Stop crying, now. No one will ever hurt you again, my little Edward.   
  
_Riddler... Please don't hurt Oswald.  
  
_ Hmh... Ok. And Crane?  
  
_I don't know.  
  
_ If he tortures you, I will martyr him?  
  
_Mhm... Depends... I will call you?  
  
_ Good.   
  
_Good.... where is Ozzie?  
  
_ I think he's showering.   
  
_Thanks.  
  
  
  
_~~Fifth Try~~  
  
  
  
Uhm... where do we stand now?  
  
_I want to keep you.  
  
_ I want to throw you out.   
  
Ok. Slowly please. It's hard to distinguish you.  
  
_Sorry. I love you.  
  
_**I hAtE yOu!  
  
** Noone asked you! Shut up Crow.   
  
**HmPf. ThIs Is My HoUsE!  
  
** Actually it's mine.  
  
_Maybe we should just.... go on. It worked so far?  
  
_ Eddie...  
  
**Well fine then.  
  
** Hey. Where do you go?  
  
**Lab.  
  
** Crane....   
  
**See you later.  
  
**_Ozzie?  
  
_ Ed?  
  
_Do you.... want to go out with me? We... could check Trap 176 together.  
  
_ Hm. Ok. Move.  
  
_Will do!  
  
_ You are so fucking sweet.  
  
  
  
~~Not even a try anymore  
  
  
  
~~**This needs to stop. Really.  
  
** I like it.  
  
**Well at least I can top you.  
  
** Oh, Shut up.  
  
**Sorry. You- the King of Gotham is not taken, right?  
  
** Fuck you.  
  
**Hmh. Nop. Rather take you or Nygma again.  
  
** Don't you dare wake him up now!  
  
**Could take you again? Oh wait, your cries would wake him too.  
  
** You fucking-  
  
**It's ok. Even if you do not have hands as nice as Edward. Or as strong.  
  
** Just shut your mouth.  
  
_What are you doing again? Ozzie? Hey...  
  
_**Nothing.  
  
** Sorry Ed. Lay back down.  
  
**Sleep tight little one.  
  
** Did you just knock him out?!  
  
**Do you want to explain this? Now get off me.  
  
** Hmh. I will hold him tonight.  
  
**Don't feel interrupted. I am going to hunt.  
  
** Wait. I didn't mean to-  
  
******It's ok. I have to breath.  
  
** Ok... Watch yourself.  
  
**Crow will do. Promiesed. Be back in the morning. Should I bring buns?  
  
** Yes please. Money is on the secretary.

 


	6. You should wear this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crane is making Oswald wear a dress for Ed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crossdressing
> 
> I am sorry, I wanted to write it earlier. 
> 
> Greetings to Melli :*

**Oswald.**  
  
Hmh? What- is that....?! Crane?  
  
**It's a dress. Oswald you love Ed?**  
  
Yes? And this is a negligee.  
  
**So, I think he would like it.**  
  
Then... give it to him?  
  
**You know, what I mean.**  
  
Crane... This is teasing lingerie. I cannot wear such.  
  
**Did you try it so far?**  
  
NO?!  
  
**So then, how do you know?**  
  
I.... Hmpf.  
  
**I see. Try it. Ed would like it. Trust me!**  
  
Oh god, it's not even non-transparent!  
  
**Yes.**  
  
Are you trying to embarrass me?  
  
**No. I want to help you.**  
  
Ed loves me without holey silk!  
  
**Hey. He loves you. But with this, he would adore you.**  
  
He would, or you would? Who wants to see me in a short, black dress?  
  
**Hmmh.**  
  
Aha!  
  
**It was just a little idea. I think, we would fuck tonight.**  
  
We do nearly every evening.  
  
**Indeed.**  
  
Wow. You were the one, complaining about.  
  
**Maybe I like your ass.**  
  
Thanks.... Ok. Give it to me.  
  
  
  
~ Late in the evening ~  
  
  
_Ozzie? What are you wearing? Wow, I can see your-_  
  
I thought you'd like it. Me. In this.  
  
_I love you without, why would i_ Like  _you with?_  
  
Eddie... don't you like it?  
  
_Ozzie... come here. I love you._  
  
Yea? You said that.  
  
_But yes, I like it on you. You look cute._  
  
Uhgh. Not what I wanted to hear.  
  
_Kiss me, yes?_  
  
Yes, of course, moonshine.  
  
_Ok. What do we do now? I mean... you are ... sexy._  
  
Hmhmmm. I know something, we could do.  
  
_I'm listening._  
  
You know exactly what I mean.  
  
_One night without Crane? What a premiere._  
  
Yes, well... about Crane...  
  
_Ugh... He is here?_  
  
He wants to... join us later.  
  
_Ohhh..._  
  
Sorry. But I think, we could do one round and cuddle a bit?  
  
_Sounds nice. Come here._  
  
Oh yes. I will!  
  
_Os?_  
  
Yeah?  
  
_You look hot. I really like this thing._  
  
Eddie...   
  
_Are you blushing?_  
  
Turn off the lights!  
  
_No. I want to see you. Keep it on._  
  
Eeeed....  
  
_Keep it on._  
  
Fine... Oh god, it's so wrong....  
  
_You decided to open the door in this thing. Now life with it._  
  
I'm not nagging.  
  
_Good. Now come here._  
  
**I told you, he'd like it.**  
  
Crane!  
  
_Jon?!_  
  
**Hey.**  
  
_Ozzie?_  
  
Maybe... he gave it to me?  
  
_Hm. Changes nothing._  
  
Thanks god-  
  
**Thank me.**  
  
No, please don't- nnhg... Not both of you...  
  
**I think I deserved it.**  
  
_Should I kiss the pain away?_  
  
Oh, shut the fuck up, Ed....  
  
_I think I never heard you swear before... Must be the dress._  
  
**Funny.**  
  
I hate you!  
  
_Of course you do. Relax._  
  
Ah.... This needs to stop!  
  
**That's my line.**


	7. New Roommates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ed rescued a little new housemate from the pet shelter. Oswald is not amused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had a writer's block, I am sorry. 
> 
> No warnings for this chapter.
> 
> It's a very short one. I had that Idea but it was shorter than I thought it would be. Maybe I'll edit it later.

*Growl*  
  
WHA! What the... EDWARD!  
  
_Yes?_  
  
What is that?!  
  
_Oh? This is a Fennek. It's a Fox, which used to live in-_  
  
I KNOW what a Fennek is. Why is it in my house?!  
  
_Well you see, I went toooo... the animal shelter and there he waaaaas... sitting alooone... with huge eyes!_  
  
Ed. You can not keep a Fennek. It's a wild animal.  
  
_But... Ozzie, he was at the shelter. Sooo he IS a pet.  
  
_ Why did you go to the shelter?  
  
 _Maybe I was... a bit alone..._  
  
Ed... Why didn't you say something?  
  
 _I did not want to bother you. You are always so busy with your work and stuff..._  
  
But Ed... You have to talk to me, ok?  
  
 _Hmh_.   
  
I am sorry. I should have noticed.  
  
 _Mhhhm._  
  
Anyways, Edward, I will not allow you to keep-   
  
Os.   
  
Ohhh. Riddler you can't do this to me.   
  
Yes, I can. Look at her. She is cute.   
  
She? Wait, what?  
  
It's a female. But Eddie wanted to name her Os, so-  
  
Ok. I see. Well... If Ed can care for her... He can keep her. But if she starts chewing my stuff, I will shoot her!  
  
I agree.  
  
Well... Welcome the Family then, Os, I guess.   
  
_Look at him, isn't he cute!_  
  
Yes, actually he is... Oh Ed.  
  
_Mhm? Don't you like him?_  
  
I like him. It's ok. Just care for him.   
  
_Promised._  
  
**So, we own a zoo now?**  
  
_Jon?_  
  
**A fox, a penguin and an Ed. Interessting. I should demand a fee.**  
  
Crane....  
  
**What? I am honest at least.**  
  
You are an asshole.   
  
_Ozzie!_  
  
It's true.   
  
**Well, it has some benefits.**  
  
You will not experiment with her!  
  
_Him._  
  
Him!  
  
**Not?**  
  
No! She is part of the family now!  
  
_He..._  
  
He is part-  
  
**So we ARE a zoo?**  
  
Oh shut the fuck up....  
  
**Just honest.**  
  



	8. Fear and what did you say?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon gets interrupted in some experiments by Edward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it's not to short. 
> 
> Chapter warning:
> 
> Hurt & Comfort, Beating
> 
> Wow, I believe it's the first time they are not ending in bed..
> 
> Ok pretty sure they do, but I will not write it xD

**So my little one, tell uncle Scarecrow, what are you afraid of?**

_Jon?_

**Uhg.. Yes Ed, I am here.**

_What are you- hey... let him go!_

**Please don't disturb my little experiment, Eddie. It's the best for us all.**

_You just want to get horny?_

**It sounds more selfish when you are saying it...**.

_Jooon.... I do like him you know?_

**Yes.**

_Please let him go._

**But I want to know what he is afraid of....**

If I may say someth- 

**Schusch, little bird!**

_I'll tell him what you are afraid of!_

**Nothing!**

_You are afraid of bats!_

**Who isn't?**

Uhm, Joker? 

**I am pretty sure he is.**

_You are afraid of crows!_

**They're assholes!**

_And of ants!_

**Nasty creatures!**

_And you are afraid of your granny!_

CRANE! 

**ShE wAs A dIrTy OlD wOmAn AnD sHe WaS a DiSgUsTiNg FoRm Of LiFe! ShE wAs BaD aNd -**

Crane! Stop! Don't hit him!

**I.. I'm sorry... Eddie I'm sorry. Let.... let me stitch this, ok?**

_It w-was... my fault... I should not have m-... mentioned_...

**Hey... I should be able to control my feelings. Come.**

_..._

**...**

_Jon?_

**Yes?**

_Jon, I want to be with both of you. Please don't experiment on Oswald..._

**Ok.**

Can you unbound me please? 

**Hm... easy prey for us.**

_Jooon....._

**Ok. Sorry. But I liked Oswald middle.**

I did not like Oswald middle... 

_I want a marriage._

Yes, Ed that's sweet, but I really did not like me in the what did you just please say that again.....

_I want a marriage._

W-what? 

**Who do you want to marry, Ed?**

_Both of you._

T-t-That's... not possible. 

**I am sure we can find a priest and.... Make him.**

Jonathan.... Ed see, it would not be a real marriage. 

_I know._

And you still want one? 

_Yes._

That's.... unbelievable cute. 

_I love you. Both._

**You are sweet.**

Aww Eddie..... 

_But I also prefer Os middle._

Ohuuu....Eddie......


	9. Just drunken stuff

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oswald had a drink or two, while he was away with Victor.  
> The Riddler is not amused.

Eeeeeddie.....  
  
What do you want, Penguin?  
  
Mmmmmhm, I want Ed. Give me Ed you drag.  
  
You are drunk as fuck. You will not talk with Edward.   
  
But I looove him....  
  
I don't care. Go and become sober.  
  
You are such an asshole, Riddler... I just want-  
  
**Little Birdie, what's that?**  
  
Hmh? Uhm.... clear film?  
  
What for? Why is this stick out of your trousers?  
  
N-Nothing?  
  
**How about you undressing?**  
  
N-N-No, I don't- Ahh! Let go! No! Don't touch me you shabby old pervert!  
  
**Aha! This is...**  
  
You really got...   
  
**A fucking**  
  
tattoo?!  
  
Stop laughing! I am already punished!  
  
**I hope you are!**  
  
A tattoo on the ass. You had better Ideas...  
  
I was... drunk and... I- I....  
  
**Yo, Riddleman. It's a questionmark.**  
  
....  
  
**WhY dOn'T wE gEt PrEsEnTs LiKe ThIs?**  
  
Crow, would you kindly... just go away, right?  
  
**YoU aLwAyS wAnT tO pLaY aLoNe!**  
  
Just fuck off, please!  
  
**FiNe!**  
  
....  
  
....  
  
Stop sobbing.  
  
I can't...  
  
Come here. Does it hurt?  
  
It hurts like shit....  
  
I hope so. You are stupid.   
  
And you are not very sensitive.  
  
I did not try to be.   
  
Then why are you holding me close?  
  
Because you should stop sobbing.   
  
Riddler... I-  
  
You love Ed. I know. I see this. If I wake up tomorrow, with a brand new tattoo, I swear you will never be able to sit again!  
  
U-understood...  
  
Good.   
  
I love you Eddie.   
  
_I love you, Os... What is that? You have a tattoo? Let me look!_  
  
Eddie... I am drunk... can we just cuddle please?  
  
_Is that a questionmark?_  
  
Eeed....   
  
_I like green..._  
  
Oh.... Eddie...  
  
_Mhm.... I love you._  
  
Careful. Ah... It hurts...  
  
_Sorry... come here..._  
  
Sleep well.  
  
  
  
~ Two days later ~  
  
  
  
OSWALD! OSWALD COBBLEPOT!  
  
Riddler. H-Hey! What's.... up?  
  
Tell me, I am not seeing right! Tell me, that I do NOT have a fucking umbrella on my fucking ASS!  
  
Uhm... It... clearly is a syringe....  
  
The OTHER SIDE!  
  
It was not my idea!  
  
So?!  
  
Victor dragged me into this studio....  
  
I hate you!  
  
But... You know Ed... It was...foreseeable.  
  
Yes it was.  
  
I am sorry, Riddler...  
  
Come on, Penguin. Time to show Crane a nice place. It's the least he can do.   
  
You think, this is a good idea, Riddler?  
  
It absolutely is not.


	10. HROO HRAA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noone can take Crane serious...

**HRROOO HRRRAAAA!**  
  
What?  
  
**HrOo HrAa?**  
  
What should that mean?  
  
**WhY aRe Ye GiGgLiNg?**  
  
Because: 'Hroo Hraa'.... is really not frightening!  
  
**I hOpE yOu DiE oN yOuR sPiT!**  
  
This is too funny, I'm sorry, Crow...  
  
**So? Your 'Riddle me this' is so much better?**  
  
It's smart.   
  
**Pah!**  
  
Oh please. Don't be sulky now.   
  
**Hey! Who laughes at me?**  
  
Yes. I do. But really... Hroo Hraa? Crane...  
  
**Shut up.**  
  
If I may say someth-  
  
**ShUt Up, PeNgUiN!**  
  
Hey! Uhm... Os, why are you here?  
  
I -... You forgot your lunch and-...  
  
**ThAt'S sO cUtE! NoW gO hOmE! ThE mEn ArE wOrKiNg.**  
  
Why are you so sarcastic?  
  
**BeCaUsE i HaTe YoU?**  
  
Oh. Well. Have fun Hrrrooooooing people... Pff.  
  
Oswald. Kiss me.  
  
Yes.  
  
Ok. Now go.   
  
Mhm. Be careful with my Eddie.  
  
Of course.   
  
**.... WhErE wAs I?**  
  
Hroo Hraa.   
  
**STOP LAUGHING!**  
  
Sorry. I really can't take you serious.   
  
**WhAt Do YoU sUgGeSt ThEn?**  
  
I don't know. Maybe.... 'I am the fear', or something like that.   
  
**....**  
  
'Fear me, pesants, Scarecrow is hunting you-' swoosh swoosh.  
  
**Swoosh?**  
  
Well... that sound your scythe is making.   
  
**Swoosh....**  
  
Yeah?  
  
**But Hroo Hraa is ridiculous.**  
  
Oh, c'mon... you know what I mean... Like old comic books. Pow, Kwam, Tshack.  
  
**Eddie?**  
  
Sleeping, why?  
  
**Just thought he was talking.**  
  
Fuck you.   
  
**Hm... No.**  
  
Crane! Not now! Let go! Hey!  
  
**Shut up. Mhm....**  
  
Craane... ah...  
  
**I love that syringe...**  
  
You have a beautiful question mark, and a nice umbrellaah... Ah... Jon...  
  
**Shhh. Just bend over a bit. It will hurt less.**  
  
I know what would hurt less. Lubricant.   
  
**It's ok. Mhhhm...**  
  
Riddler... Why do you let Crane fuck you?  
  
Mhh... Os... Ah... Hey.. Didn't you... want to go?  
  
Well uh I-  
  
**Come here, birdie. Give him a blowjob. Maybe he starts liking us.**  
  
You think so?  
  
DON'T you dare touch that!  
  
That?  
  
...  
  
I love you.  
  
Mh... Oswald...   
  
**Yes... Moan for us, Riddler.**  
  
He's blushing!  
  
Ah... I-...   
  
**Oh, I have an idea. I will train you. Every time I say 'Hroo Hraa' you will get horny. Every time you hear that phrase, you feel the burn inside of you, to get fucked by me.**  
  
This will not work Crane. I am not in trance.   
  
**But while having sex, the subconsciousness is very respective for input.**  
  
I - so fucking... ahh hate you...  
  
  
  
~ A few weeks later ~  
  
  
  
_Crane... I am tiered. Why do I have to go with you?_  
  
**Mh. Kiss me Eddie.**  
  
_Why are you so attached today?_  
  
**Ed?**  
  
_Mh?_  
  
**Hroo Hraa.**  
  
....  
  
**I love you.**  
  
_Jon... Can you fuck me, please?_  
  
**I'd love to, my precious.**  
  
_I'm confused..._  
  
**I know. Kiss me.**  



	11. Some difficulty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon can't sleep and suddenly...a Visitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Such fluff much love. Him dirty language I guess.

**Hey....**

_Oh, hey! What's up?_

**I can't sleep.**

_Yea, well... it's just 3 in the morning. Why are you trying to sleep?_

**I felt tiered.**

_I see. Shall I play something. Maybe you fall asleep watching?_

**No.**

_Shall I play some music?_

**No.**

_Hrm... you are making it difficult._

**....**

_So... how can I help you?_

**I want to cmbblm...**

_What?_

**I want you to cmbblm wmpf m....**

_Uhm.... What?_

**Oh my... Ed... I want you....**

_Ya?_

**Schmeep wif me...**

_Oh! You want to cuddle!_

**Shut up!**

_Sorry. I_   _just..._

**Stop laughing....**

_Mh. I Love you._

**Yes. Can we-**

_Oh. Of course. I'll just finish this and -_

**Now.** **.. Ed... please...**

_Hm... ok._

**Thank you.**

_Wait, I'll throw these pillows away._

**Why the heck do you .... your bed is oversized and you sleep on one arms length?**

_I like Pillows..._

**And books. And games. And what is this?!**

_Hey! He's my birthdayfloof! I got him on my first Brithday!_

**Sorry.... I'll put him on the shelf.**

_Ok. Now we have some room for dirty thin- hm._

**Shhh... no. No sex tonight. Only....**

_Love?_

**Yea...**

_Did not know you have a soft side?_

**Shut up.**

Hey! What are you doing?

**Get out!**

Oh. Crane don't be so mad. I want to cuddle, too!

**We're not- ... fuck you, penguin!**

Wanna watch?

**Get the fuck off Eds bed!**

I think Eddie should decide.

_How about you two shut your mouth?_

Eddie, I was just-

**I was here first!**

_Ahhrg! Get out of here!_

**But-**

No! Go, or I'll make you!

**I hate you, penguin!**

Sorry, not sorry.

**YoU wIlL bE sOrRy, WhEn I aM fInIsHeD wItH- who the hell rings the door at such a time?**

I d-don't know... you go answer it!

**No way! Could be Batman!**

Could be pizza.

**Well... Batman does not ring, right?**

I guess....

HEY THERE!

Victor?!

I'LL LIVE HERE NOW. ISN'T THAT AWESOME, BOSS?

Yea.... super awesome....

SO SUPER AWESOME!

**Why are you here again?**

WELL, I GUESS FIREFLY DID NOT LIKE MY NIGHT WITH HARVEY-

Dent?!

BULLOCK.... UHM WHATEVER... MY FLAT BURNED DOWN SOMEHOW...

**Is there anyone you did not fuck?**

UHM... YES... THE GIRLSQUAD.

Whatever....

** You will not touch Edward! **


	12. Not that kind of doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, Jonathan Crane is a doctor, isn't he?

JONATHAN!  
  
 **Oh, Victor. What's wrong?**  
  
I'M BLEEDING! STITCH ME UP!  
  
 **Why would I? Ask Oswald.**   
  
BUT YOU ARE THE DOCTOR IN THIS HOUSE.  
  
 **I'm not that kind of Doctor.... Come here already. But this is the only time, I'm doing this for you!**  
  
HAHA. YOU'RE THE BEST, MAN!  
  
 **Hold still.**  
  
 _Jonathan?_  
  
 **Ed. What's wrong?**  
  
HELLO MR. RIDDLE-MAN.  
  
 _I have to die, I think._   
  
**Ed. What's wrong?**  
  
 _Uhm... I... uhm... I have fever and... I'm so cold and..._   
  
**Go, see a Doctor.**   
  
_But-_  
  
 **I'm not that kind of Doctor.**   
  
_But you are stitching Victor._  
  
 **Yes. But I am not a Doctor.**   
  
_You are..._  
  
 **Yes. But not for general medicine. I am psychologist.**  
  
 _But you are a Doctor._  
  
 **Oh, Ed.... Wait a minute, I'll make you tea and a bath...**   
  
I think, we should discuss our Problems.   
  
**Oswald?**  
  
Yes. You are a psychologist, as you just said.   
  
**Yes, but not for crisis in relationships!**  
  
Is there any big difference?  
  
 **No, Oswald... Not one bit. As it seems, all doctors are the same.**  
  
Don't you taunt me!  
  
 **I do not.**   
  
You better do not.  
  
SHOULD I MAKE HIM A SANDWICH, BOSS, SIR?  
  
No, Victor. Edward loves him, I guess.   
  
_I want a Sandwich..._  
  
But not from Victor!  
  
 **You are getting soup!**  
  
 _You are so cruel..._  
  
 **When you are sick, you will have to change your habituation of food.**  
  
 _Maybe I am not sick...._  
  
I heard you vomit...  
  
 _Shut up, Oswald..._  
  
 **So, as good as new.**  
  
THANKS DOC!  
  
Victor!  
  
SORRY?  
  
 _He does not like to be toutched._   
  
OH? IS THAT A MENTAL DEFECT OR A FEAR?  
  
 **Victor... don't go any further. For your own good.**   
  
MHHH, SORRY, HAVE TO GO ANYWAYS.  
  
Take your bag!  
  
YES. OK, SENT ME A TEXT WHEN YOU NEED ME, BOSS.  
  
 **Where were we?**  
  
 _Ed is sick, and we have family problems, and you are not a doctor, but you are a doctor, but you are not._   
  
Did you speak in third person?  
  
 _Sometimes it happens..._  
  
 **Oh Eddie... Come here.**   
  
You are a professor, too...  
  
 **That's right.**   
  
Why did you waste so much time in getting academic titles?  
  
 **Because, Mr. Penguin-**  
  
 _Do not argue, please._   
  
**Ed, we don't argue, I am just saying, I- EDWARD!**  
  
JON! Do something!  
  
 **Call an ambulance, you idiot!**   
  
Will do! Didn't he say he has fever?  
  
 **Yes, but we both know, Ed keeps things low!**  
  
Can you drag him to the couch?  
  
 **I'll carry him!**  
  
Sorry, you don't look, like you could lift-   
  
**CaLl tHaT fUcKiNg AmBuLaNcE!**  
  
 _Don't.... bicker..._   
  
**Oh, Ed....**


	13. Cardgames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ed plays cards with the Riddler in the middle of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little something that came to my mind whilest I played Magic with my partner.

_I play this card and then I attack you with these 3 monsters._  
  
Eddie. That was not very wise. I block with the two and destroy these 4 monsters. I let the third go through. I am at 7 life points.  
  
_HA!_  
  
I play a mana source, lay a creature and attack with these.  
  
_Oh._  
  
Since you no longer have defenders, you have lost.  
  
_I..._  
  
You should not have attacked with everything.  
  
_That was mean, I did not know you were playing a creature with haste. I'd have just survive that!_  
  
What are you doing, Ed?  
  
_Oswald. We are playing cards!_  
  
Really? You and...?  
  
_The Riddler._  
  
Oh. Understand. How does this work?  
  
Do you really want to know? He plays with me because I'm smart enough for it.  
  
This is just a card game ...  
  
You can watch a play, so maybe you understand it better.  
  
So mean!  
  
Psst.  
  
_OK. I'm starting. I draw a card, play this and this. You are._  
  
Fascinating.  
  
Ain't it? I also find it practical that he can play with himself. And without knowing my cards.  
  
Really fascinating.  
  
Ed, it's your turn.  
  
_OK. Ehm ... Let me think, I'll play this, and then I'll attack you_.  
  
Very good.  
  
Fascinating.  
  
**What are you doing?**  
  
Ed plays cards with himself.  
  
**Why does not he play with you?**  
  
I do not know the game at all.  
  
**OK. Does not look complicated.**  
  
Thank you.  
  
I play this creature and attack you again with this one.  
  
**How long does a round take?**  
  
_Oh, half an hour or more._  
  
Fascinating.  
  
You already said that.  
  
**Let me play, ok?**  
  
_Jon?_  
  
**Of course. Give me a deck like that, too.**  
  
_Os, you too? Then ehm ... we'll have two against two._  
  
If that has to be.  
  
**The loser is in the middle.**  
  
Jon!  
  
_I do not find the idea wrong._  
  
Great.  
  
_Hahaha. I help you._


	14. So mean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When everyone in this house hate each other, why are they living together?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Batsy.

Jonathan?  
  
**What do you want?**  
  
Why do you hate me so much?  
  
**Oh, I do not hate you, Oswald.**  
  
Oh, really?  
  
**I hate humanity.**  
  
Great. That is much better.  
  
**Isn't it?**  
  
And why are you treating me like shit and don't do it to Ed?  
  
**Because Edward loves me.**  
  
OK. He loves you. Do you love him not?  
  
**I can stand him most of the time.**  
  
That's not nice.  
  
**I'm not nice, you've already noticed that.**  
  
True, I forgot that you are an asshole.  
  
**I would not say that so.**  
  
I would.  
  
**Good evening, Riddler.**  
  
There! You do not treat him like shit!  
  
He is afraid of me.  
  
**I respect you.**  
  
Oh, how generous.  
  
**Be happy.**  
  
Of course, of course.  
  
And why do you respect him and nobody else?  
  
I'm up to him.  
  
**Indeed.**  
  
Ok, wow. It all boils down to me, that you think I'm stupid.  
  
Well, you're not as smart as Jon, we're not going to talk about myself.  
  
Riddler. You're still a big asshole.  
  
Thank you.  
  
That was no compliment.  
  
I know, little man.  
  
So why are you here when you hate the world so much?  
  
Edward loves you.  
  
Pfft.  
  
**WhY iS nO oNe TaLkIn' To LiL oL ScArEcRoW?**  
  
Ugh. Absolutely no one likes you. Go away.  
  
**HeY! So MeAn, NeRdMaN!**  
  
**But he is right.**  
  
**Y-YoU dO nOt lIkE mE?**  
  
**Does this surprise you?**  
  
**I .... T ... I tHoUgHt ...**  
  
And he is gone.  
  
Oh no. Not that he does something stupid ...  
  
He is scarecrow. He will discuss with him and then he will do something stupid.  
  
This is not good.  
  
I do not care, as long as he does not do anything to Ed. A few days in Arkham have never hurt anyone.  
  
You're such an asshole.  
  
**...**  
  
Crow?  
  
**G-Go AwAy!**  
  
Crow, hey ... I thought you might wanna talk?  
  
**I sAiD GO AWAY!**  
  
Crow, I do not want to go away. I am afraid you want to do something stupid.  
  
**AnD?**  
  
Edward loves your body and the man living inside.  
  
**YeA. HIM.**  
  
Crow ... You are ... Not that bad.  
  
**WhAt?**  
  
I mean sometimes you are ... loud and I am afraid of you, but you can be a pretty ... nice one, too.  
  
**NiCe OnE?**  
  
Remember that one time, you gassed Batman and so he ran against the lantern and could not chase us down? That was awesome.  
  
**AwEsOmE ...**  
  
Hey Crow ... Do not be mad with Riddler and Jon. They are antisocial as fuck and ... They have no idea.  
  
**BiRdBoY?**  
  
Oswald.  
  
**ThAnK yOu!**  
  
Uff. Strong hugs. Can not breath. Ouch.  
  
**SoRrY ... BEST FrIeNd!**  
  
Oh ... well ... Guess so.


	15. Not listening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon is never ever listening to Edward. And he is buying stuff on his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crossover Chapter MONSTER HUNTER and SOUL EATER (Mentioned)
> 
> I love my OC's and Noyo is a Character I love to bring into Rpg's very often. Mostly she lives at Arkham, which is ok for the guards because she discovered one or another breakout and/or Batman.

_See, that is why I hate to talk to you on the phone._  
  
**Why?**  
  
_Because you are not listening._  
  
**I'm listening.**  
  
_No. What did I just say?_  
  
**That I'm not listening.**  
  
_Aha. And before?_  
  
**....**  
  
_Aha!_  
  
**See, I'm always barely listening to you.**  
  
_You asshole. What is more important than your fucking husband?!_  
  
**I bought a dragon welp.**  
  
_You bought what?!_  
  
**A dragon welp.**  
  
_WHAT?!_  
  
**Dragon. Who is not listening now?**  
  
_I did indeed understand you, but where the fuck did you buy a dragon?!_  
  
**Oh, a friend made it. Frank Norman Stein.**  
  
_Oh. Yes. Of course, how could I ever think- ARE YOU TOTALLY CRAZY NOW YOU FUCKING-_  
  
**Eddie. Don't swear. That is not good for you.**  
  
_You, Sir Master of Fear, are a stupid asshole._  
  
**I know. So when will you arrive home?**  
  
_As I told you earlier in this phone call-_  
  
Ahhh!  
  
***** queh **!***  
  
Jon!   
  
_Is that Ossie?_  
  
**Oswald stop she is just a baby.**  
  
It is bigger than me!  
  
**That's no magic trick.**  
  
Fucker.   
  
**Noyo - Oswald, Oswald - Noyo, now let me talk to Ed.**  
  
Noyo, huh?   
  
***queh?***  
  
Ok. Good boy...   
  
**It's a girl. She does bite.**  
  
Thank you, not what I wanted to hear.   
  
_Jon... you can't keep a dragon._  
  
**You can keep Os.**  
  
_She's a fennek!_  
  
**And Noyo is a Nargacuga. Hmpf.**  
  
_Ok... What does she eat?_  
  
**Insects and fish sometimes meat.**  
  
_No humans?_  
  
**She is too small to hunt humans.**  
  
_..._  
  
**I can literally hear you raising that eyebrow.**  
  
_Ok. Jon. Look... we can try it._  
  
**All right. So I can keep her? She is really cute.**  
  
Yes, she is.   
  
***queh!***  
  
_Oh boy... right. I'll be home in 3 hours... just don't... burn down the house._  
  
**She can't breathe fire!**  
  
_Thank god._  
  
**So when will you be here?**  
  
_Crane.....!_

**Author's Note:**

> I also wrote an original story, please give it a read :>
> 
> It's about pre-apocalyptic war and the end of humanity. Find it over my profile or use this link.
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/14146287/chapters/32602506


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